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Howard Iken asked:




Conjure up an image of divorce. The average person visualizes people sitting in a courtroom, giving testimony, with a judge at a bench presiding over everything. But the actual reality of most divorces is dramatically different. Forget high profile, exciting confrontations in courtrooms that were built 50 years ago. Most of the time, one or both spouses will never see the inside of a courtroom. More often that not, one spouse attends a short, 10 minute hearing. During the hearing a judge reviews a mediated settlement agreement, previously negotiated by the parties. If everything looks proper, the judge signs off on the divorce.

The vast majority of divorces in Florida are relatively boring exchanges of paperwork and telephone calls, rather than exciting court action. The average divorce case consists of tons of paperwork creation. The mountain of paperwork is interrupted by long waiting periods. Those waiting periods allow the opposing party time to create and send a similar pile of paperwork. The legal action consists of repetitive paperwork, exchange of financial documents, punctuated by the occasional phone call. The process rarely varies and the paperwork in each case is similar if not the exact same. One spouse sends a petition, the other sends an answer. Each spouse exchanges financial affidavits, tax returns, paycheck stubs, and other types of documentation. The attorneys act as paperwork mills, churning and spinning out pounds of identical documents into the postal system. Copies of documents are filed with the court records office. Judges rarely, if ever get involved at this stage. All of the documents, legal pleadings, notices, and forms, are oriented toward the mediation process. If mediation is successful it is the final event in most divorces.

In Florida, and in many states in the U.S., the process of mediation has become a mandatory step in a divorce. In the Mediation meeting each party, their attorney, and a neutral-unbiased mediator meet in a room. The mediator’s job is to negotiate an agreement that will cover all divorce issues. If the parties come to an agreement, a contract is written by the mediator and everyone signs the contract. At that moment in time the divorce is virtually over. The written agreement is binding and all parties must obey the terms. The only formality is to have a judge sign the final judgment.

Mediation appears to work. Over 90% of divorce cases settle by the time they get to mediation. Of the 10% that do not settle by mediation, the majority settle some time before final trial. The bottom line: only 1 out of 100 divorce cases go through the colorful confrontation in a courtroom that many people visualize or see on television. The vast majority, 99 out of 100 cases, never make it to court. There is no doubt: mediation works. The benefit: thousands of dollars in attorney fees are saved. Money that could pay for rebuilt lives is not diverted to the bank accounts of each attorney. Cases are brought to an early end. And each party to the divorce ends up having little or no contact with the court.

Copyright 2005 The Divorce Center P.A.

David M Siegel asked:




While is true that a change in the ability of a recipient of maintenance to support herself could constitute a substantial change in circumstances, the court record indicated that the husband failed to present evidence of a change in the wife’s ability to support herself and the court found that the husband failed to meet his burden of showing a substantial change in circumstances. Without a substantial change in circumstances, the order remains in full force and effect.

In another case, however, the court found differently. In that case, the woman had become employed. The court record supported the trial court’s determination that she remained unable to adequately support herself through her employment and that no substantial change of circumstances had occurred for her financially. Thus, she continued to receive the support from her ex-spouse.

The court will often look at the income and expenses of the parties to see if a change has occurred. If the change is minor, the court will not likely amend the support order. For example, in another case, neither husband nor wife demonstrated a material or substantial change in their relative positions. Thus, the trial court did not abuse its discretion in refusing to modify the original maintenance award.

When you are considering going back to court to change a support order, keep this in mind; there is a great expense in petitioning the court. Cases are not often resolved in one appearance. Thus, make sure that you truly have a change in circumstances prior to involving the post-decree courts.